The Law of Resistance
Have you ever complained about something that is annoying you, only to find that the more you complain, the worse it feels? There is a psychological reason for that. It’s known as the Law of Resistance. It says, “What you resist, persists!” In other words, the more you push against something, that something pushes back with the same force or maybe even greater. By your defiance you are creating greater resistance. You are multiplying the resistance of what you don’t want!
Some examples of resistance could include such things as complaining, sharing negatives with others, calling others to find someone who feels worse than you do or at least the same, verbally expressing your aches and pains to anyone who will listen. The result is that the resistance gets stronger. So, the reality is that we don’t help ourselves by resisting. We actually strengthen the resistance. We are actually giving our energy to, “what we don’t want!”
Some may be thinking right now, “Why didn’t someone tell me this when I was young; why don’t they teach this in school, or how are people supposed to know this?” Well, I guess you can just be thankful that you know it now! Knowing this is just a starting point, not a solution.
A good question right now would be, “Why do we automatically or naturally do this?” Here’s why. All of us are instinctively unconscious of this fact because it is supported by our natural instincts. We instinctively respond this way because our human instincts are connected to our minds (thoughts and feelings), and our minds are under the control of our subconscious. Our subconscious acts as a memory bank of our past, both the good and the bad. As we age the subconscious seems to be controlled more by the memories of our fears than the memories of our good times.
As a result, when we encounter resistance in life, we respond from our subconscious memories of fearful events, and we resist instinctively. In other words, resistance is instinctive and encouraged by our natural human instincts! So, we resist from our natural instincts, and it tends to become a natural response.
So, what’s the answer? The answer is simple but difficult. The answer is –“Surrender!” Now, before you get angry and start shouting, I implore you to read just a little further. Surrender, as I am using it here, does not mean giving up, quitting, ignoring, rationalizing, agreeing with, accepting or any of that type of thinking. Surrender, in this case, simply means not resisting “What Is!”
My most used confirmation related to the Law of Resistance is, “It is what it is; what am I going to do about it?” The reasoning behind this statement is this. I know that I can’t change what is, but I can choose not to resist it. Why? It is because I don’t want to add to the power of the resistance. By simply confirming what is, I don’t add to the power of the resistance, and I begin to send my conscious energy to, “What am I going to do about it?”
Try this simple response to any resistance in your life. You will find that it not only helps you respond to difficult and annoying problems in your life, but it brings energy into your life. You are building your energy to grow bigger than any of your life’s problems and circumstances of resistance.
Until next time,
May God Bless!
David Byrd is an author, coach, consultant, and a developer of personal growth behaviors in pursuit of Achievement. Founder and CEO of The Byrd Group, he is a master of effective leadership and works closely with leaders and their organizations worldwide utilizing a system of personal management and achievement called the Next Level Achievement System™. He is a best-selling author with four published books, a sought after speaker, and leadership development consultant.